I think sometimes without even realising, we lose sight of just how far we’ve come. We forget all of the endless hurdles, the giant speed bumps and the countless obstacles that we’ve so bravely overcome to reach this point and more often than not, we disregard the effort that it has taken us just to get to the here and now.

I think sometimes we focus too much on leaving the past in the past, placing all of our energy on working towards a bigger, brighter future when really we should be taking a moment to step back and reassess. Reassess not only the future, but more importantly, the past and the present.

I think sometimes without even realising, we place so much pressure on ourselves to reach a certain point or to achieve a certain goal and in an attempt to constantly remain moving forward, we forget to turn around and look at the bigger picture. We forget to remind ourselves just how far we’ve come.

I think sometimes it becomes so easy to lose sight of our progress, forgetting that nothing in this life comes easy. All good things take time; time accompanied by a continued strength, courage and determination and even then we don’t always end up exactly where we had hoped to be.

I think sometimes we allow our natural instincts to take over, causing us to constantly create new goals before ever really acknowledging the accomplishments of the countless other goals that we have already achieved.

I think too often we forget to stop and congratulate ourselves on the little things, the things that although we may not consider to be some of our greatest achievements are actually a lot greater than we may realise.

I think that if we spent a little less time pushing ourselves to achieve more and a little more time being proud of all of the countless other things that we have already achieved, then perhaps that overwhelming sense of happiness that we are all so eagerly longing for would appear almost instantaneously; almost as though it was there all along.

It makes me smile to say that surprisingly enough, after just twenty-two magical years on this earth, I am continuously amazed by the countless wonderful people I have been blessed to have in my life.

People who have never in any way been obliged to look out for me and yet still, out of the goodness of their own hearts, they have done exactly that. People who although they may have appeared to have been somewhat hidden in the background at times, have really never wandered very far at all. People who although I may not have quite realised it at first, have remained right there beside me on this crazy rollercoaster of a ride, the whole entire time. People who have always, always had my very best interests at heart and never once at any stage has that even slightly changed.

People who have not only shared in my triumphs, but who have also shared in my struggles. People who have not only shared my endless smiles, but who have also shared my countless tears. People who have been so overwhelmingly beautiful that they have left me counting my blessings from the very first moment that they walked into my life. People who every single day, make my life just that little bit brighter simply by being themselves.

The best part though, despite only just recently realising the full extent, is that even if I were to use all ten of my tiny little fingers and all ten of my tiny little toes; it still wouldn’t be enough to count all of those beautiful people who I have been so incredibly blessed to have in my life.

I think it’s fairly safe to say that nothing in this life is promised. Not today, not tomorrow and certainly not ten years from now. Time and time again the world has proven to us that sadly, just as quickly as life can be created, it too can be taken away. More often than not, without even the slightest of warnings.

As confronting as it may seem, life has the potential to be one of two things; a beautiful, breathtaking miracle or a heartbreaking, unexplainable tragedy and unfortunately, ninety-nine percent of the time that choice is completely out of our control.

While we may choose to believe that our lives are a direct result of the choices we make and the paths that we follow, what we often forget is that our lives are also directly impacted by the choices that others may make and the paths that they too choose to follow.

Each and every one of our lives are made up of a string of events. Events which are determined almost entirely by the time and the place in which we find ourselves, at any given moment.

The people we meet, the relationships we form, the opportunities we are given and the paths that we take depend entirely on the situations of our every day lives. Every single day we find ourselves in a situation that has the potential to drastically change our lives, be that for better or for worse.

Every single day we find ourselves surrounded by people who have the ability to directly impact our entire world, be that positively or negatively and while there are days where that choice may be entirely up to us, there are also days where that choice is completely out of our hands.

At the end of the day, life is unpredictable and while more often than not the world is a beautiful, magical place, there are days when it completely breaks your heart. Days when despite your usual unwavering faith in the world, you are left questioning everything that you ever thought you knew.

Days when you are yet again reminded that for every ten thousand questions we may happen to know the answers to, there will always be one million more that we do not. One million more questions that despite our endless attempts, we will never fully be able to make sense of and as unfortunate as it may be, it is quite often the most important questions of all that seem to always go unanswered.

For the longest time, I have been waiting for something momentous to happen before I could write ‘My story’. I was waiting for that big, official happy ending and to be perfectly honest, it has taken me up until this very moment to realise that a picture perfect happy ending was never what I needed at all.

All I ever needed was proof that despite the countless setbacks, day by day, I have continued to move forward. Proof that finally, I have closed that chapter of my life and I am now able to begin writing the next one in a whole new shade of colour and whilst that chapter will always, always be there to reminisce upon, it in no way needs to be left wide open for those memories to have meaning.

The imprint of those life lessons goes far beyond the depths of any ink covered page. The imprint of those life lessons has been left somewhere much more permanent, somewhere that no amount of weather could ever begin to fade. Somewhere that despite the years passing by will continue to remain perfectly intact and regardless of the chapters that may follow, it is those very moments that will both influence and inspire not only the beginning and the ending, but every aspect in between.

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While it officially began a few months prior, approximately one thousand, one hundred and ninety-eight days ago, my world had well and truly been turned upside down. Not only could I barely make it from my bedroom to the bathroom without having to stop and catch my breath, but I was beginning to lose count of the number of extremely elderly women who continued to overtake me, each and every time I would visit a medical practice.

What first began with a simple migraine had fast developed into something much more serious and within a mere matter of weeks, the happy, healthy, outgoing nineteen year old girl that I had once known was just a fond but distant memory.

Soon enough, showering became a daily mountain climb, similar to that of Mt. Everest and holding a conversation became so exhausting that it was just easier not to speak at all. My once picture perfect memory became non-existent and the body that I had so carelessly taken for granted was beginning to waste away.

To the naked eye however, I appeared perfectly fine.

To those people on the outside who caught only a brief and fleeting glance into my life at that point in time, nothing seemed out of the ordinary; the façade of an “I’m fine thanks” followed by the quick flash of a pretend smile and sure enough once again, all was well in the world. Those who stayed just that little bit longer however, were able to develop an insight into an illness that at the time, I myself could not even understand. An illness that while overwhelmingly common, is still not in any way recognised by the majority of medical professionals nor is it acknowledged by the members of our everyday society.

Like 99.99% of other Chronic Fatigue sufferers, a trail of endless doctors visits, specialist appointments, naturopathic consults, homeopathic remedies, magic healers and alternative therapists brought us no closer towards answers. Instead, it was beginning to seem that rather than properly diagnose, the medical industry as a whole preferred to disregard the vast range of symptoms and pass them off anorexia or depression, followed closely by the typical “It’s all in your head” comment.

Eventually though, after countless tests and far too many dead end roads, an official diagnosis was finally made. A diagnosis which at first, like the rest of the world, I was unsure what to make of. Ironically enough, I was under the impression that as the name implies, the illness was a simple matter of extreme fatigue. As I soon found out however, that could not have been further from the truth.

Not only were the days filled with extreme, unimaginable fatigue, but the pain went so far beyond just that, that even now, it is almost impossible to describe.

Night after night spent battling Fibromyalgia so severe, that no amount of pain killers or wheat packs could dull the pain. Every second of every day spent trying to cope with headaches so strong that I honestly believed at any given moment, my head was going to explode. Internal organs that were slowly but surely, doing everything in their power to one at a time, completely shut down. Digestive problems so persistent that eating even the smallest of meals would cause a chain reaction of events. A list of food intolerances so long, that even I myself struggled to remember. Brain fog so constant that not only would I forget a conversation I had held just a moment ago, but my vocabulary had dropped to that of a three year old; making it near impossible for the words to travel down from my brain and out of my mouth. Hormones that were going so wild and crazy that not even the doctors knew what was going on. Circulation problems that not only turned my feet a beautiful shade of purple, but left me with hours of pins and needles. Heart palpitations so strong and so sudden that not only was I almost thrown out of my chair each and every time, but I was beginning to genuinely fear the likelihood of a heart attack. A constant state of low blood pressure that caused more vasovagal episodes than I have ever before had in my life. A perpetual haze of dizziness that began to make everyday life a nauseating blur. Eyes that had become so light sensitive, I was beginning to feel like a real life Gremlin. Lactic acid levels that were so high, they could compete with that of a marathon runner and an immune system that was left so compromised, that I managed to fall into the mere 2% of the population who instead of coming down with a common cold, managed to find myself hospitalised with Viral Meningitis. A list of symptoms that while my body may have slightly dulled the memory of, I will never, ever forget.

Along with those symptoms however, came an even longer list of tried and failed attempts to cure and while I won’t bore you with the details, I will share with you some of the highlights:

1. Lymphatic drainage massages twice a week that whilst undoubtedly being beneficial for my recovery, more often than not, had me in tears.

2. A two-hour long drive, weekly, to a clinic that not only gave me a painful Vitamin B injection in my rear end, but who also treated me to an hour long vitamin cocktail that was given via an IV drip. A cocktail that despite not helping at all, became more excruciating as the weeks passed by.

3. My personal favourite; a spontaneous visit to a man who had access to a device which unfortunately, legally allowed him to electrocute his patients. A device which sure enough, he proceeded to use during my visit, more times than I was able to count. Needless to say, it was without a doubt the most traumatic experience of my life.

As horrific as all of that was however, despite the negative way in which Chronic Fatigue obviously impacted my life, the wonderful people that I was lucky enough to have been surrounded by, made it all the more possible to stand back up every time that I would fall.

My amazing Mum; the one who held it all together when the rest of the world would have so easily let it all fall apart is without a doubt, the single, only reason that I am where I am today. Without her endless love, support and persistence in finding answers, I can honestly say that my world would be very different right now. Without her constant positivity and daily reassurance, I have no idea where I would be. Not only is she my rock, but she is my very best friend.

My strong and stable Dad; my beacon of strength. The one who was there each and every time that I needed to fall in a heap and cry on his shoulders. Not only is he my constant reality check, but he has continued to remind me that although there may indeed be limitations right now, those limitations are not in anyway forever.

It is because of these beautiful people that I was able to fight through the toughest of days and somehow, make it out the other side. It is because of these beautiful people that I was able to find the inner strength to wake up every single day, for one thousand, one hundred and ninety-eight days and continue to hold out hope that one day, tomorrow would be different. One day, I would wake up to a tomorrow that was not only pain free and beautiful, but a tomorrow that held the promise of a bigger, brighter future. It is because of these beautiful people that I am able to say that treasured ‘one day’ has officially arrived; tomorrow is here and not only does the world appear more beautiful and more precious than ever before, but the future is becoming brighter by the second.

One thousand, one hundred and ninety-eight days on from what has without a doubt been the most challenging experience of my life and I can say with absolute confidence that day by day, those baby steps are finally becoming just that little bit bigger.

So, to that lovely female doctor who appeared to have no problems telling a fragile, nineteen year old girl whose entire heart belonged to the sport of baseball that she would never play again, nor would she ever be even slightly physically active; I am here to tell you that you were wrong, in every sense of the word. Not only have I signed back on to play the one sport that you told me I would never play again, but today, for the very first time in one thousand, one hundred and ninety-eight days, my little legs and I went for a run. A run that although only small in distance, was larger than life in meaning and although the act itself was overwhelmingly freeing, it was knowing where I had come from in relation to where I was now that was the most rewarding of all.

To that lovely female doctor who shattered my spirit and broke my heart, I am pleased to say that not only have I managed to pick up the pieces and place them back together again, but despite your lack of confidence, I have managed to turn my life into something even more amazing than I ever could have imagined.

Today, for the first time in one thousand, one hundred and ninety-eight days, I reached what I believe to be the single, greatest milestone of my life. Today I proved to myself that despite endless setbacks, I am well and truly on my way to the life that I have been dreaming of for far too long. Today I proved not only to myself but to the world, that despite the struggles life may throw our way and the time in which it takes us to overcome them, if we look hard enough, there will always, always be a light at the end of the tunnel.

It just so happened that today, that tunnel brought me out to the single greatest moment of my life thus far, to a light that had taken the form of the most beautiful, perfect, sunshiny day that I had ever laid eyes upon. A day that I will not only remember, but will cherish, every day for the rest of my life.

So whilst the past one thousand, one hundred and ninety-eight days have indeed been quite the struggle. One that I would never in one million years wish upon anyone, honestly I would not change a thing. Despite the countless moments of uncertainty, it was that very same struggle that has without a doubt molded me into the very person I am today.

A girl who is strong, but has known weakness. Confident, but has known self doubt. Brave, but has known fear and above all else, hopeful, despite being faced with endless reasons not to be. A girl who despite countless rainclouds and stormy weather, has been able to find sunshine and beauty in some of the most unlikely of places.

Today I am beautifully, blissfully, wonderfully happy for no reason other than the fact that for the first time in a really, really long time, I have no reason not to be.

No crazy appointments, no busy schedule, no back to back plans and nothing that desperately needs to be done.

The sun is shining, the words are flowing freely and there is not a single thing that I can think of that could even slightly dampen my mood.

Today, there is nothing but smiles and sunshine.

Dear world; thank you for reminding me that still, after all of this time, you know just how to take my breath away.

To be honest, right now, it’s all still a little bit surreal and despite having dreamt about this moment daily since we first returned home from our 2012 adventures, I still can’t quite believe that it’s all happening again.

However, as of approximately 3:48pm today, it all became official. Come May next year, my amazingly wonderful boyfriend and I will be on our merry little way to New York, with thirty-four magical days ahead of us. Thirty-four magical days, just the two of us, in a whole new world.

I suppose you could say that already, I am more than a little bit excited and while for the moment we may only have the beginning and the end officially booked, planning the rest is what’s going to be the most fun of all.

For now though, the highlights are more than enough to have me already counting down the days.

Sight seeing in New York, revisiting that crazy Las Vegas strip, road tripping the West Coast of California with my favourite, ‘Train – Half Moon Bay’ on repeat and last but certainly not least; wasting the days away on the breathtakingly beautiful beaches of Honolulu, Hawaii.

Together, it all adds up to the true definition of wonderful; a wonderful, once in a lifetime adventure that I cannot wait to begin.

Now, for those of you keeping score, you are probably already aware that I am yet to find that elusive money tree. For now however, I have temporarily given up the search and instead, I have decided to enjoy being one of the luckiest girls in the world.

For now, I am busy thanking my lucky stars for the amazing parents that I have been blessed with and the circumstances I have overcome. Thanking my lucky stars for parents who despite my current lack of finances, have beautifully and selflessly given me the chance to leave the past in the past and explore a bright and promising future.

Parents who have given me permission to completely disregard the every day restrictions of life and explore the world, regardless of the finer details.

Parents who despite circumstances, have continued to have faith not only in the person I am, but in the person I will become, allowing me to have faith in myself.

Parents who have given me the courage and the endless support not only to fly, but to soar.

Let’s just say that if we were living amongst the land of dreams right now, where absolutely anything was possible; then I would capture all of these moments, sneak into my own little bubble, close the bubble door tightly and quite possibly, never ever leave.

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That very first hug after far too long apart.

The first day of winter in fresh flannelette sheets.

The sweet smell of Jasmine blossoming in the spring time.

Lazy days spent frolicking in pyjama land.

Brand new bed socks on a cold winters day.

The sight of a mail box filled entirely with junk mail.

Warm soup belly and endless amounts of green tea.

Never ending sleep in’s on perfect rainy days.

Wagging tails and excitable puppy stories, just when you need them the most.

The first steps off of a plane, stepping out into a whole new world.

Waking up on game day to blue skies and sunshine.

Smiling at a stranger who can’t help but smile back.

The first conversation between a new bestfriend.

The sparkle in someone’s eyes just before they surprise you.

The very first time you realise their hand fits perfectly in yours.

Laughing so hard that the whole world disappears.

The hidden magic beneath those days that you are certain you will remember forever.

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Let’s just say that if I could, I would happily relive those moments forever.